it's sooo coooooollllddddd!!!! Bangalore weather has become quite painful over the past few weeks...



.....i just finished watching 'Sea Biscuit' for the 5th or 6th time...i feel the same way everytime the movie ends...same as i do when i watch 'Schindlers List'...or 'The Shawshank Redemption'....or 'Crash'....

There's something about 'the movies'...i love watching movies. On any given night, after i'm back home from a long day of work...you'll invariably find me in front of the t.v. tuning into HBO or Z Studio or Star Movies...i don't rent out movies much, but love going and watching movies in the theatre...

I love movies that are larger than life...like 'Lawrence of Arabia' or 'Ben Hur' or more recently...'The Aviator'....'Troy' and 'Ali'...i feel the same way everytime after watching one've those movies....a little emotional with tears in my eyes :) ...it's cuz i feel so ~inspired~ by how much this one person gave of himself to life...even how much the actor gave of himself to the role...

After watching 'Ali', i bought two books about 'Muhammad Ali'...i think about people like him and feel so....small....inadequate even....which makes me aspire to be like them.

I felt the same way when i heard 'the plastic bag theme' from 'The American Beauty' soundtrack....feel the same when i hear 'tomorrow' from the 'Ali' soundtrack...

What do i have to complain about when so many before me have given so much of themselves and achieved so much....purely for the thrill of human achievement.......purely for that.....

I complain about my office...about my car...about traffic...about clients...about money...about people...about things....places...events...everything....i complain and complain....

It's not to say that people who lived great lives didn't complain...and here i'm not making a comparison between me and ANY of these people...you have to earn the comparison if there is one... i haven't yet.

Beethoven was a crabby man with a frightening temper...he ill treated a lot of people, even from his own family...lived in isolation for a long time...and yet gave so much of himself to something that was an extension of him and yet something he didn't own completely - cuz he believed he didn't....it was there to be shared and that's what he was doing....sharing....

I was talking to my 'Shihan' if that is the correct word to use...about Ninjitsu and he was explaining to me about the history behind the art and how people are so secretive about sharing information...about sharing secrets...

A lot of Ninjitsu as we know it today has been passed down by families that had their own 'protectors'...protectors or guardians of their clan...and so they developed unique ways and methods to protect themselves from rival warriors and other fighting clans...as time passed and the world modernized...these 'secret fighting methods' became schools in themselves that we now train in - Jujitsu, Taekwondo, Judo etc...but all these are specific methods of fighting, the knowledge of which has possible been passed down over generations - to what we know and practise it as today...but the origins of which lie in a family in a remote part of Japan or China...

I brought that up cuz even today, the various practiotioners of 'Bujinkan' aren't completely open about their practises...they don't completely share vital or even 'open' information simply because...well, just cuz they dont.

And so we as people look for inspiration...i look for inspiration in a world of 'make believe'...which sometimes is based on life...and sometimes is not....but storytelling is truly an artform...and in a different context, it's sad that the ancient 'story tellers' or 'master storytellers' of India...as we read about them in fables..or aesops fables :)...they don't exist anymore...or if they do, you'll maybe find them in the bylanes of Varanasi somewhere...

Have to go now...also realized that i need to get out've my comfort zone of having the office only in one specific area, cuz it's 'convenient'...

have a great sunday!