A heightened state of awareness. I wrote about this many months ago.

I just watched 'Great Expectations' for the first time. And now it's one've my favourite movies to watch. It seemed so ....real. The story was a contemporary fairytale - but the emotion with which was expressed was more real than some real people care to feel.

Over the last few weeks, i've been left pondering about who my friends are. There are some i feel a sense of 'competition' with. Other who insist on taking potshots at my expense. Yet others with whom it's unpredictable. Am i being overtly judgemental? Or are my relationships with people i've known for some time now...evolving?

Sometimes as a result of evolution, things better. Other times, they don't - they just move into a different direction. And people grow apart. With two of my friends, i feel that happening. Maybe i am judgemental. Is this also part of 'growing up'?

"Choosing" - ?

Making selfish choices. Friends that contribute to my growth - and so i choose to contribute to theirs. "Matlabi Duniya". "A dog eat dog world".

* SNAP *

...and ties break. Am i being overdramatic? Maybe...My problem is that i'm too nice, and people take advantage of that. No - i let them. I smile and laugh it off. Under the pretext of, "I'm not like this - how can they be? How can people be like this?"

People are the way they are. If certain choices have to be made - they have to be made. Life goes on.

Over estimating friendships can be a dangerous thing. Something i wouldn't advise. Have i over-estimated some? I'll know soon.