I've been thinking for a while now that writing on this blog isn't very efficient. In that - the writing from the past hasn't been very efficient in expressing what needed to be expressed and also the process of writing on this blog any further isn't very efficient.
I have to take time out, compose my thoughts and then express them by way of typing them out for friends and strangers to read. I could be doing so much more with my time.
That's what happens when you have a 'vision' and a burning desire to get there. Everything else takes a backseat and you get this animalistic need to succeed.
One've the main reasons certain companies lose their way is cuz the light isn't shining brightly on the top (also in referrence to incompetence in top management) - the light is blurred or not in sharp focus...or is distracted from the task at hand.
What is the task at hand?
Staying focussed? Yes. Having a vision? Yes, that too. And all the other stuff you read in self help books and management books and a whole lot of other stuff that fills up reams and reams of pages as part of thousands of case studies and books that hit the market across the globe every year. But most of this stuff is commonsense really. And about getting the job done.
Recently i was sitting with a client who wanted to get an 'Information Memorandum' put together to then give to his VC and banks for possible investment into his enterprise.
He said, "Right now - the only way i make sure i'm not going in a loss is by keeping my rates reasonable to bring in business and my costs low - and the difference amount i'm left with after all costs incurred - is my profit. Which i take out and stash away for safe keeping." A simple, practical way of doing business. Also harks back to the 'Lala' mentality.
Not 'lala' as in sounds you make with your tongue while trying to sing along with a song you don't know the words to - but 'lala' as in a merchant owner or money lendor of some sort - as part of traditional indian enterprises - more notably in villages and the like.
The 'lala' mentality is about - 'making money'. They don't understand 'branding-shanding'.
"Mennu pata hai - ki pasie kaise banande hegene"
Beyond knowing that money is made in a government run mint - you need to know how to make money...and to make money, you need to know the difference between 'money' and 'cash'. 10bucks in hand is worth more than 1000bucks in cheque - cuz you have the 10bucks to fill your stomach now. The 1000 bucks will come to party three days later.
Where does all this link with self-motivation - and the light on top? Well, speaking from personal experience, it's very easy to flounder and let go of something you've worked hard to build - case in point being this little studio i run. Throughout it's short life - i've had a tremendous amount of opportunities come my way - touchwood. And i'm greatful to god for the same. But i havent' capitalized on many of them. Have let a lot of them slip away even. Why? I dunno. Actually i do.
It's cuz just like the seasons change in the year - seasons change in business as well. A formula working for you today, won't necessarily work for you six months down the line. The idea i started this company with 3 years ago has remained the same over the last 3 years - and maybe thats both a good and bad thing.
What the idea is...isn't why i started writing this.
When you start a company - you need to be very clear of what you want - in your life. Having dreams and ambitions and, "this company is my ticket to fame and fortune" is all well and good. But have a plan. In paper - not in stone. But one with numbers, facts - figures. They keep your ground realities more certain. They keep you in check.
Over the last 3 1/2 years i've been through a series of ....difficult....relationships. And a they've pretty much co-incided with the life of this company.
When you're an individual - starting a company and running it on your own - YOU are the company. And the company is you. It's your credibility, your image your word....and all that. But it's all real.
I think too often we choose foolishly. With my relationships - i didn't choose foolishly, it's just that i didn't realize the magnitude of the impact my sometimes inability to balance both work and play - would actually end up having on my work.
Yesterday, i was chatting with someone who said that i'm too hard on myself. That there might be others out there who have accomplished more than me - but going by the rate i'm at, i'll be very accomplished in due course of time.
My thing is - i don't want to just be 'accomplished'. I want to be 'great'. I aspire towards 'greatness'. Of shining like a beacon. Of towering over everyone else. Not for the power - No, not for that. Not for the fame. Not for the fortune.
For the fact that i will be there. Just for that. And the fact that i made it happen - on my own. Not without outside help - but i did it cuz i saw it happening. the vision really is that of a Lenin or a Stalin - a bronze 120foot statue towering over the landscape...in a stoic...vision....seen in the cold bronze eyes.
I guess i'm day dreaming a bit.
The reason these men and others have achieved what they have and continue to do so is because they believed they could. The motivated themselves enough to move - to take a problem and challenge - head on. To say, "Go fuck yourself" when required. And, "I fucked up" when required. No point in knowing how to say one without having the ability to say the other.
It's important to find in you - that which drives you. It's money - great - go make a pile of money. Fame - go be famous. Women - go screw a few hundred. Jack Nicholson has screwed over 2000 - and he has all three.
You want to be Jack Nicholson - then what the fuck - BE JACK NICHOLSON. There's nothing stopping you.
It's important to strike a balance between your personal and professional life - and keep a DISTINCT distance or difference between both. It's a discipline.
Self-Motivation is also a discipline. One that's important to develop. Just like 'Execution' (not killing people) is also a discipline. The ability to get-things-done. Different people have different ways of getting it done - but as long as the job is done, that's all that matters.
Self-Motivation is about being able to be positive - at will. You hand an accident? Your mother died? You just fucked up on a big project and lost a tender?
These are all realities and possibilities. And yet the expression goes, "Grace under fire". Some people shine out bright when the chips are down. If you know one've these people - you in turn are lucky to be shining in that light, because one've the amazing things with these kind of people is that if you are loyal and true - they'll take you with them on the journey. The journey towards living an extraordinary life.
I was once told that, "If you want to live an extraordinary life, you'll have to face extraordinary problems." Which is why when today i'm faced with a seemingly unsurmountable position - i say, "Fuck you, you think you'll get me down? Go fuck yourself first." That might seem more than just a little arrogant - and not really 'realistic' - but it keeps me going. It makes me think. It stops me from wallowing in, "What next?" or "What do i do?". All that shit is just a waste of time - you can't get ahead in life thinking about the past.
I just had an epiphany...
"...you can't get ahead in life thinking about the past."
My thought for the day.
What is it like to be a 'man of honor'?
To be a 'man of your word'? To always know what's right - and how to uphold it? To know it instinctively - instantly? To be a 'man of dignity'? Of 'respect'?
Of honor...
I remember someone said to me once that, "A man of honor is one who has the courage to do the right thing, when it's easier not to."
Am i a 'man of honor'? A 'man of my word'?
no......
....it shames me to admit it.
Bono.
Muhammad Ali.
Nelson Mandela.
Gandhi.
Martin Luther King Jr.
Bhagat Singh.
...were they all 'men of honor'? I'd like to believe so. They're men i admire....aspire to be like....'someday'.
Living an 'honorable' life, above all, has got to be the toughest thing anyone could do. It's so easy to live dishonorably, and never even admit it.....forget to others - not even to yourself.
What is it like to live a 'valiant' life? What is it like to live a 'full' and 'complete' life?
Who is a 'man of honor'?
Is he someone who never fails? Never makes mistakes? Never veers from 'the path'? Never ill-treats anyone? Never bad mouths anyone? Is never...'weak'? Never has moments of weakness? Moments of bad judgement? Moments when things were hazy?
....i don't think so. That's just an 'ideal' we live by.
Bono.
Muhammad Ali.
Nelson Mandela.
Gandhi.
Martin Luther King Jr.
Bhagat Singh.
All of these men have been weak, made bad choices...bad judgements...been 'bad people' in the conventional sense at some point in their lives - but what makes them who they are is that undaunting spirit....that will in them to 'make a difference' - in others' lives.
You might be weak, stupid, might have made mistakes, might even be a 'bad' person (in the conventional sense)...but everyone gets a chance to make amends. To 'go beyond this'. To 'turn the corner'. Everyone does...and that 'doing' is taken to a different level when it's 'doing' for others. Forgetting yourself in others...in what you do for them. What you can do for them...how much of yourself you can give to them...how much of a difference you can make in their lives...in one life-time.
You only have time enough to live one life...ofcourse, you can experience 'many lifetimes' within this one...but the experience of it all is enriched in experiencing life through the eyes of another...seeing a different perspective....on life....and sometimes on yourself. Enriching yourself. Growing yourself. Investing in yourself...and in building friendships....relationships....good... all around you. To believe that - to know that 'THAT' is what you were meant to do. Then again, not necessarily...but to just live life for people other than yourself. In making a choice as hard as that, is when you have access to the doorway of 'honor'...because it isn't about 'you' anymore. It's about people around you...your family, your friends, your colleagues...and not necessarily just your own....but 'people' you meet in life.
Living an honorable life comes from wanting to do so. From wanting to hold yourself accountable - and not others pointing that out to you.
Being true to your word - doing what you'll say you'll do - when you say you'll do it.
Being honest. It's tough, sometimes it's gut wrenching to stand by the truth - more so because you have to face your own demons...and uglier truths about yourself - but standing by the truth is honorable. It's difficult - but it's honorable.
And living an honorable life is also about loving - yourself, the people around you and 'life' itself.
"Life's a bitch. And we're married to it." That's one way of looking at it.
Things can be as simple as you want them to be or as complicated as you make them out to be - same with life. Most of us spend too much time concentrating on deciphering this complicated, $10 Trillion code called 'life'. It really isn't that complex you know?
Tell the truth, love the people around you, don't wantonly cause anybody harm or hurt - it's pretty simple.
The difficult part is in accepting the 'simplicity of life' :)
....how i wish i was a child again....running up and down the beach in miramar....eating bhutta and chat...sitting on the beach in the evening....watching the moon and people walk past langorously....feeling the breeze...smiling...holding hands with my mum or granny....
Living with honor is sometimes about that degree of simplicity.
Seeing the world through the eyes of a child.....
...ever noticed how - when you're truly inspired - you see everything so.....clearly....
how every conversation is about the sounds coming out of your mouth that link with your brain and make you feel different emotions...
like the opening of a gate...suddenly you notice how the hinges are fairly loud in their squeaking...and the rust seems so red...and when you look closer, the peeling paint lined with the red of the rust seems like borders of different nations...or fighting armies about to pounce on each other...
everything seems so clear
you feel the breeze...the warmth of it on a sunny day...can almost taste the sweat...the sky is a clear ocean blue...a sparrow walking up a tiled roof...the beams of light falling in between buildings...the dryness of old walls...the dust on the walled surface....the pinkness in the color...a bubble gum pink perhaps...
each step is so measured...you feel the dirt under your feet...feel it shift with everystep....the sound almost piercing your ears...
a heightened sense of awareness
why cant we be more aware...like monks perhaps....is this the state they live in...where everything they see has an ethereal glow around it...seeing energy all around....touching....feeling....sensing....
I'm excited!!!!
Since we've had enough of the sopping and moping around in the last few posts ;) ...i'm gonna share with you the reason for the sudden excitement!
I have a vision. :) Lets' give some background story...
When i started this studio with Arnab, 3 years ago - i knew what would 'work'. Instinctively. I knew what would sell, i knew what would work in terms of design, presentation - and i did it with much excitement...the exuberance of starting something afresh.
...but i killed that excitement just as quickly in wanting to project a certain 'image' of professionalism - without really understanding what the word meant. Point is i killed the excitement for myself....and the 'vision' of the company and for the company started to blur...i was doing things because i thought they fit into the mould of 'professionalism'...and not because they were part of the 'exit design' identity.
It's so important to know who you are, what you're about, what your quirks are, your strengths, your weaknesses....to know that about yourself - about your company. So often we work in environments because -
1. the pay is good
2. i like the people
3. the company is making money
4. we have a fancy office...
fine....but 'who' is your company? What is it's identity? If it were a person - what kind've humour would it like? Would it like tacos or nachos? Would it be scared of flying? Would it sing in the rain? ....im guessing it might be a bit of a stretch to try and apply some of this to some large tech firm....but tihs kinda thing works for us - and that's what i just realized. :) It took me three years! - no less...but 'realization' is like that....
This company is about fun...and eccentricity....and quirks and being psycho....all this stuck under the corporate suit made of armour - if it doesn't give you the freedom to just 'be'? It might as well be a suit made of steel!
Wow....i had a wow moment....after a long time (all the filthy minds - go wash ur brains with soap!)
hehe amazing how a little space can open up so many possibilites...
(uggghhh!! i didn't ask you to use hamam - buy some industrial detergent if required!!)
